I love riding roller coasters.
My wife, on the other hand, is not a fan. So, when it came time to expose our children
to the joys of roller-coaster riding, it was to be my personal pleasure to
introduce them to this wonderful, thrilling invention of man. Or so I thought.
I can remember the day when each of my children took their first
roller coaster ride. The excitement,
dread and anticipation was almost too much to bear as they struggled with their
decision to ride or not to ride, and then decided to go forward,
reluctantly.
Imagine my frustration, after eagerly anticipating the ride to come and
the joy of sharing the experience with my child . . . and waiting as patiently
as possible for up to an hour or more in the amusement park line . . . all
the while watching as the child becomes more and more nervous . . . trying to
make small talk, distract, change the subject, only to find him bailing out in
tears just before boarding the ride.
For some of them, it took several years to get up the courage to
ride. I had to wonder, if I would ever
have someone to share this roller-coaster experience with.
Then I went to Busch Gardens with these same formerly reluctant,
roller-coaster adverse children, all of them now in their teens or twenties. Busch
Gardens , for those of you
who may not be familiar, is a roller-coaster enthusiasts’ dream with at least
five fantastic coasters. And we rode
them all, over and over. And over. And over.
Until I, the roller-coaster master, the undisputed king, the Jedi of
g-forces, had to quietly say, “Enough.”
And at this my boys said, in echoes of my own voice, “Come on dad, let’s
ride again. Please will you at least try to ride with us?”
And I found myself saying, in a voice that sounded almost child-like,
“I think I’m going to be sick.”
So, does this mean my parenthood journey is completed? As the great philosopher-father Kal-El in the
superman comics said, “The son becomes the father, and the father becomes the
son.” Something amazing happens to our
children as we age together, and it is nothing short of a miracle.
I see this same behavior repeated in a number of other areas: seeking a job, filing a tax return, and going
out on their first date. Not that I want
to accompany my children in all of these activities, but I do see the same
reluctance, fear, and second-guessing. Finally, with continual patient encouragement,
an eventual victory is celebrated. Often
they surpass my own accomplishments and go on to greater achievement.
It’s a wonderful transformation.
So keep on pushing your kids.
Let’s get on the parenting-coaster and ride. At least until I throw up.
_____________________
At the time of this writing, Duane Highley’s children were ages 13 to
24.
dadoonad@gmail.com
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