About ten years ago, I was a single, 31-year-old bachelor. I had
never been married or had kids of my own. A new show came out that year, hosted
by Jeff Foxworthy, called, "Are you smarter than a 5th grader?" At
the time, I thought it was the most ridiculous idea for a show ever! I mean,
come on, of course adults are smarter than the average grade school child . . .
right? Then I watched an episode, and soon realized, a lot of the stuff I
learned in school, had been lost over the course of 15 to 20 years. All of the
information these 5th graders were learning was fresh on their minds. In some
capacity, these children were smarter than me.
Fast forward, ten years later, and here I am with two junior
high age kids, whom I adopted when I got married. We soon added my biological
son, who is now in first grade. It's sad to say, but I have no clue how to help
my teenagers with their math homework. I think it was about 4th or 5th grade,
when the math I knew, completely changed. I remember trying to help my then 8-year-old
with some division problems. I wrote it all out on paper, and he looked at me
like I was doing trigonometry. He said, "Dad, this isn't how we do it at
all." He then showed me some of his work, to which I'm pretty sure it
looked to him as if I were trying to read abstract algebra. That was my first
experience with common core math. Pretty much everything I was taught in
school, was now different. It's not like I was a math genius in the first
place. I was average to slightly above average back in the day.
My daughter, now in 8th grade, struggled her first semester of
7th grade in a few classes. I tried to help where I could. I quickly realized,
the best thing to do was communicate with her teachers and set up extra time
where she could get one-on-one sessions with them. Her grades eventually went
up. My oldest son, now in 7th grade, is struggling mightily in math, science
and social studies. Again, I've tried to help where I can, including the use of
Google and YouTube, but it doesn't seem to be enough. My son also has ADHD, so
I've had to adjust his medication, because he has not been focused enough to
get his work turned in on time. I've been in contact with his teachers to let
them know my plan, and for them to try to monitor his behavior and to keep me
posted if things don't seem to turn around. As a parent, you have to know your
children, you have to know their strengths and weaknesses, along with your own.
It's also good to know what motivates them and what doesn't. Sometimes
incentives can help your child try just a little harder.
The homework I most look forward to, is when my daughter has to
practice singing for her choir class. I could listen to her voice echo
throughout the halls of our home for hours. With that harmonious delight, comes
the exact opposite. If given the choice of listening to a feline in heat, claw
at a chalkboard for an entire day, or my 7th grader practice the flute for 30
minutes . . . I'd choose Fluffy all day long! Obviously I'd never let him know
how I feel, but I do try to schedule my showers, lawn mowing or other outdoor
chores to align with his flute practice.
My six-year-old, who I thankfully can still help, has to be
reminded each day that his work must be done before he can play on his iPod or
play video games. He will normally do his work while I cook dinner. He is the
type of kid who thinks everything looks better with stickers on it, including
homework and books. I constantly have to remind him it's not appropriate on his
schoolwork.
Last week, while making dinner, I was trying to multitask and
fold laundry as well. My youngest brings home index cards with sight words on
them. He is supposed to write those words multiple times on each card. On this
day, while I was in the laundry room, he decided to decorate his work with some
stickers he found in a drawer. He was so proud of what he had done, that he
brought them to me to show off. Unfortunately, the "stickers" he
found, were actually a book of "Delicioso" Forever Stamps. We then
spent the next 20 minutes trying to salvage $10 worth of
"stickers".
Homework can be stressful for both the student and the parent,
but there are far more resources available today, than what we had 25 years
ago. Don't be embarrassed if you don't know the answers. Most teachers are
willing to spend extra time with your child, if you just communicate with them.
Stay on top of their grades and make sure work is being completed. Keep an eye
on their mood and behavior throughout the school year. Most importantly, keep
the cool looking postal stamps, out of reach from young middle school children.
Herb Cody is a husband and father of three. He is a part time Uber driver and full time caregiver of his spouse, who suffered a traumatic brain injury after an auto accident November, 2015. Herb loves football and is a St Louis Cardinals fanatic. He and his family live in Nixa MO. Herb can be reached for questions or comments at herbie05@yahoo.com
You can check out Herb's own blog at, www.thecodylife.weebly.com
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